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I love WordPress in large part because of the large number of plugins that are currently available. It seems that all you have to do is a simple search on the plugins page and you can accomplish nearly anything on your blog.
And yet, somehow, the tremendous community of developers that keep WordPress moving forward never seem to run out of ideas. In fact, just take a look at some of the hottest plugins that are in the works to be released early next year.
The 9 Hottest WordPress Plugins Coming in 2011
Fasten your seat belts and hold onto your boxer shorts because you’re about to discover some of the greatest WordPress plugins ever thought of and they’re all coming soon to a blog near you.
- WordPress Twitter Thanks: There’s no better way to express gratitude for someone retweeting one of your articles then to publicly express your appreciation to them in your twitter stream. In 2011, WP Twitter Thanks will take care of this for you. With over 200 predefined thank you messages, this auto engager will respond to every retweet with a seemingly customized and personal thank you.
- Auto Comments: Get ready to blow your readers away with the level of engagement taking place. The Auto Comments plugin will instantly generate hundreds or even thousands of comments across your site using the database at BabyNamer.com to provide unique names every time. There are thousands of predefined, universal comments in the database. And just for using the plugin, your domain will be used randomly as the backlink for the comments that are generated on other blogs.
- Kanji to English Converter: This plugin is perfect if English is your second language. It will instantaneously take your english language attempts and turn them into something Shakespear would be proud of.
- Auto Submit: This plugin is perfect for submitting your content to Twitter, Facebook, StumbleUpon, Digg, Buzz and more all automatically…and all over and over again. Want 100 retweets on one of your articles? Just adjust the slider in the admin panel and your dream will come true.
- Keyword Padder: This plugin will automatically target the most searched term throughout your article and then fill the article with that term while still making the article sound like it was written by a human.
- The PageRank Interceptor: When a user visits a page on your site with a Google Page Rank checker built into their browser, this plugin will intercept their browser’s attempt to retrieve your page’s rank from the Google server and will feed it a number much higher than the truth. Your visitors will see you as at least 2 levels higher than your actual Page Rank providing you with instant credibility.
- Ninja Profits: Big profits – sharper than a throwing star. This plugin automatically creates Adsense clicks while random users are visiting your site never allowing an IP address from the same area to click one twice. This beta version of this plugin has been working with zero banned accounts for over a year and has already made thousands of dollars for its creators.
- DiggIn: This plugin creates hundreds of fake Digg accounts which will each randomly vote on different articles across the Digg site and will then also vote on your article guaranteeing you instant front page articles. No need to waste time networking. Go right to the top with a fake audience.
- Affiliate Check Creator: Make your own images of you holding your own affiliate check from Google Adsense, Clickbank and many others – Be Like Shoemoney.
If these plugins aren’t enough to get you excited about another year with WordPress then I don’t know what will. WordPress users, we’ve got an exciting year ahead of us. Be sure to download each of these plugins as soon as they’re released or prepare to get crushed by the bloggers that do.
I’ll see you at the top!
Disclaimer: This post is a parody. To my knowledge, none of these plugins are being created. If any of these plugins actually exist or if you actually hope to use any of these on your blog then I feel very sorry for you.
P.S. If you think today’s article was funny then would you please consider bookmarking it on Delicious with the button at the top? Thanks in advance for the help.